MakeAmericaGreatAgainVelociraptor

Chen Hosting

Pricing Packages


Packages

    Pricing packages start as low as a million dollars! There are four packages available: Trump package, Hillary package Bernie Package and Canadian Package.



Trump Package

    The Trump Package is great for bloggers who want to talk about their daily lives on how American and how they're going to make America great again. How they're going to make it Bigly. It's even great for writers who want to write stories about how they started at the bottom of the food chain and made it up with only a small loan of a million dollars. This package is the most affordable one that even the people at the bottom of the pit can afford and it can be yours for only a small loan of a million dollars.

This is package only contains the most basics services such as Secure Data Transfe, Geo-redundancy and so on.
*** Perfect for those with small hands, orange skin and hair that looks like a toupe.(aka a freakin human sized OompaLoompa from Willy Wonkas Chocolate Factory)


Hillary Package

    The Hillary Package is the perfect fit for large corporations and government officials. This is an upgrade to the Trump Package by including the best security measures that money can buy. These include all of our security features: Secure Data Transaction, DDoS Protection, Geo-redundancy and ISO/IEC 27001:2016 Certification. This means you have access to all of your data anytime, anywhere. For example, if you have incriminating evidence that can get you thrown into prison, all you need to do log on and erase everything. No trace is left behind. Not even the experts at the FBI can find anything to incriminate you. If they do, then tough luck, you should know better than to post incriminating evidence on the internet. This package can be yours if you promise to pay the fee and then go back on your word and do the complete opposite when it's time to do what you said.

This packact contains everything from the most basic package as well all the security features the our services offer.
*** Perfect for those who are grandma's and are trying to fit in/appeal to the younger generation with jokes such as " I don't know who created 'Pokemon GO', but I've tried to figure out how we get them to have Pokemon ...go ...to ...the polls".


Bernie Package

    The Bernie Package is the perfect fit for young teens and young adults who want to write their blogs (similar to the Trump Package) about how corrupt America is but do nothing about it other than write about it on their blogs. This package is only here for a limited amount of time until the Hillary Package forces it out of the race. This package is perfect for those individuals who want everything to be free and expect the top 1% to pay for everything the 99% want. All you got to pay is nothing because this won't work in the long run and your website will be shut down.

This package contians only the most basic package similar to the Trump Package but has no security features in place.
*** Perfect package for those who want freedom and believe the government is corrupt and believe everyone else is completely wrong if they disagree with your opinion.



Canadian Package

We purchase a one-way plan ticket to great ol' Canada to get away from all the BS in the Murica's.

Complimentary Canadian Bacon (Ham) and a polar bear,



Pricing Table

Trump Package Hillary Package Bernie Package Canada Package
Basic Basic. Corrupt Basic One-way Plane Ticket
Basic Securiy Maximum Security No Security Canadian Bacon (Ham)/Polar Bear